Today, on my 34th birthday I know how truly blessed I am! On a day that could have consumed me with what I don't have and who isn't apart of it, I was shown that I am loved and that love fills my heart right now.
With beautiful messages from friends and family left on my Facebook page, the emails I have received and the texts and bbm messages wishing me a happy and wonderful year, I thank each and every one who took the few moments out of their days to let me know that I am loved. That I am thought about. In the end, that's all that we really want right? To know that you matter. To know that aside from the hectic lives that we all lead, knowing that someone will take even just a few minutes to let you know you are special. That means the world to me.
I received a beautiful flower delivery at work today from my mom. She always knows just what to do! Just knowing that I have one parent out there in the world who loves me and will always take the time to tell me and show me means more then I can say. With a biological father who doesn't care enough to even have me in his life, knowing that I have her love and support is all I need.
Today marks the beginning of my countdown. I am giving myself one year. One year to lose weight, get healthy and get baby ready. By this time next year, on my 35th birthday, I want to be walking into a fertility clinic, ready and able to get pregnant. With the recent medical issues that have arisen this past year, I am determined to reverse what is happening and be physically able to get pregnant and have a beautiful baby of my own. Since being diagnosed with PCOD, and the specialist I was sent to telling me that I am infertile, it broke my heart. After finding out that it is reversable, I felt like I was given another chance. With being on this new journey of living a healthy life, now its time ti kick this into high gear. One year and then BABY MINE!!
I'm going to start doing some research and hopefully will be able to speak to someone at the fertility clinic here in Toronto in hopes of getting as much information as I can. In 365 days, I think I can learn alot!
Take it easy everyone!
Misty
xo
Showing posts with label PCOD. Show all posts
Showing posts with label PCOD. Show all posts
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
Saturday, August 20, 2011
My new Mantra
I'm almost at the end of another 7 day detox. It's been a strain at times but looking back over these last 6 days, I feel so good about it! It was all worth it. I'm down 6lbs this week. YAY me!! I did gain a few lbs over the last few weeks but am down those plus a few more. I am now just 4lbs away from hitting the 30lb mark. Feeling awesome about that!
My main thought of focus to give me the extra pushes this week was simple. Two words. A Baby. It's what I want more than anything else in the world. So I have one year. I am giving myself one year to be healthy and fit enough to be in a position to have a child. I'm coming up to my 34th birthday in about 3 weeks. By the time 35 rolls around I want to be ready. I am hopeful that the health issues I have experienced the last few years will have cleared up and will be moving in a positive direction instead of what is happening now. At the moment, I am not able to have children. I am infertile, dealing with what has been diagnosed as PCOD. Polycystic Ovarian Disease. The specialist I have been seeing says that it is completely reversable which gives me great hope that in the end I will be able to have my hearts desire. A child of my own. The first task at hand to get a handle on this is losing weight. Hence my main motivation. If I want a baby, I must must must lose weight. I have to take better care of myself. No way around it.
I'll continue to have my struggles, that's a given. However, struggling to eat properly and fighting with myself to get on my treadmill is nothing to the absolute pain and anguish I feel inside at not having a child. Utter physical pain. I may be ambiguous to most things outside of my own realm of understanding, but if there is one aspect of myself that I know to be truer then anything, truer then the sky is blue, it's that I would be a wonderful mother. I would be present and loving. I would be a teacher and a provider guiding through all of lifes challenges. I want this so bad.
If I am in a relationship with someone and the time came to have a child, I would welcome that with open arms. If I am single, I wouldn't think twice about it, wouldn't skip a beat while on my way to a fertility clinic. If having a child ends up being something that my body won't allow, adoption would be my other alternative. This is going to happen. I believe it. I have to! I have to make this my mantra. To say over and over to myself, something to repeat as much as I need it. Ready for it? My new mantra is Baby Mine.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCgDgJsTR_w&feature=related
A tear jerker I know....I'm boo-hooing here too. But it's a gooder, you can't deny that!!
So my journey continues. Onward and upward. Baby Mine.
Thanks for tuning in!
Misty
xo
My main thought of focus to give me the extra pushes this week was simple. Two words. A Baby. It's what I want more than anything else in the world. So I have one year. I am giving myself one year to be healthy and fit enough to be in a position to have a child. I'm coming up to my 34th birthday in about 3 weeks. By the time 35 rolls around I want to be ready. I am hopeful that the health issues I have experienced the last few years will have cleared up and will be moving in a positive direction instead of what is happening now. At the moment, I am not able to have children. I am infertile, dealing with what has been diagnosed as PCOD. Polycystic Ovarian Disease. The specialist I have been seeing says that it is completely reversable which gives me great hope that in the end I will be able to have my hearts desire. A child of my own. The first task at hand to get a handle on this is losing weight. Hence my main motivation. If I want a baby, I must must must lose weight. I have to take better care of myself. No way around it.
I'll continue to have my struggles, that's a given. However, struggling to eat properly and fighting with myself to get on my treadmill is nothing to the absolute pain and anguish I feel inside at not having a child. Utter physical pain. I may be ambiguous to most things outside of my own realm of understanding, but if there is one aspect of myself that I know to be truer then anything, truer then the sky is blue, it's that I would be a wonderful mother. I would be present and loving. I would be a teacher and a provider guiding through all of lifes challenges. I want this so bad.
If I am in a relationship with someone and the time came to have a child, I would welcome that with open arms. If I am single, I wouldn't think twice about it, wouldn't skip a beat while on my way to a fertility clinic. If having a child ends up being something that my body won't allow, adoption would be my other alternative. This is going to happen. I believe it. I have to! I have to make this my mantra. To say over and over to myself, something to repeat as much as I need it. Ready for it? My new mantra is Baby Mine.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCgDgJsTR_w&feature=related
A tear jerker I know....I'm boo-hooing here too. But it's a gooder, you can't deny that!!
So my journey continues. Onward and upward. Baby Mine.
Thanks for tuning in!
Misty
xo
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