Surround yourself with only people who are going to lift you higher. ~ OPRAH


In this day and time, we all are in search of something. Knowing what that something is may not be clear, but the ache sensation inside us is real. We can feel it. My hope in writing this blog is not only to benefit me but for you as well. For me, it provides me a sort of therapy. I can get my thoughts and feelings out there, knowing that someone can understand. It’s for you because I truly believe we follow certain paths. A path that has brought you to this very site. Whether what I have to say is meant for you to read personally or for you to share with someone else that may need it. I believe that we all are connected by one commonality. We all want to be seen. We all want to heard. We all want to know we matter. Well my Friend, I see you, I hear you and you do matter.


Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Quotes

Do one thing you think you cannot do.  Fail at it.  Try again.  Do better the second time.  The only people who never tumble are those who never mount the high wire.  This is your moment.  Own it.  ~Oprah

I'm not sure about anyone else but I find a sense of comfort in quotes.  They inspire me.  They uplift me.  I find it soothing to my soul when I come across the words of others that reflect my own spirit.  Following in the footsteps of my Lady O, I have a quote book.  I went to the bookstore and picked up a journal and have started writing down all of my favourite quotes.  I have some poems and songs in there too that inspire me.

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.  ~Eleanor Roosevelt

Storms make oak trees take root.  ~Proverb

The first time someone shows you who they are, believe them.  ~Maya Angelou
 I love how they make you think.  Sometimes, they make you want to be a better person.  To live a fuller life, a happier life.  Other times, they can hit a personal nerve that has you wiping a tear away but wanting to keep reading more.  So, on that note, I want top share more of what is inspiring me right now.  I would love to hear from you what quotes move you.  Share them with me!!

I don't think it's possible for people to hurt me anymore.  They are only giving me their observations, I am giving it meaning. 

Breathe.  Let go. And remind yourself that this very moment is the only one you know you have for sure.

I say the universe speaks to us, always first in whispers.  And a whisper in your life usually feels like 'Hmm, that's odd' or 'Hmm, that doesn't make any sense', or "Hmm, is that right'?  It's that subtle.  And if you don't pay attention to the whisper, it gets louder and louder and louder.  I say it's like getting thumped upside the head.  If you don't pay attention to that like getting a brick upside your head.  You don't pay attention to that, the brick wall falls down.  ~Oprah

Resentment is like drinking poison and then hoping it will kill your enemies.  ~Nelson Mandella

We delight in the beauty in the butterfly, but rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty.  ~Maya Angelou

Stop trying to fit in when you were born to stand out.

When you want something you've never had you have to do something you've never done.

There is a crack in everything.  That's how the light gets in.  ~Leonard Cohen

You can accept or reject the way you are treated by other people, but until you heal the wounds of your past, you will continue to bleed.  You can bandage the bleeding with food, with alcohol, with drugs, with work, with cigarettes, with sex, but eventually, it will all ooze through and stain your life.  You must find the strength to open the wounds, stick your hands inside, pull out the core of the pain that is holding you in your past, the memories and make peace with them.  ~Iyanla Vanzant

Enjoy these.  Just a few of my favs.  Hope one of them touches you the way they touch me.

Until next time ladies and gents....take it easy.

Misty
xo

Sunday, October 16, 2011

Life Lessons

Life lessons are all around us.  If we can be perceptive enough to pick up on the subtle pokes they give us, we can learn more and more about ourselves with each passing year.  I don;t know about any of you, but the person I am today is not the person I was this time last year or 5 years ago.We change with the times and if we are truly tuned in to our inner self we can pick up even the slightest of twitches.

Oprah's Lifeclass started last week.  Each week night we can tune in to her program and let one of the greatest teachers teach us. I excitedly awaited each episode with notebook in hand waiting to hear what the latest lesson was going to I made a be and what I could get out of it.  After all, that is what lessons are all about right?  Soaking in what we learn and being able to apply it to our lives. 

The first 2 episodes were about the false power of ego and letting go of anger leading to forgiveness.  How many of us can relate to those?  Something that someone said on that first episode really resonated with me. 

'I don't think anyone can hurt my anymore.  They are only giving me their observation.  I am giving it meaning.'

I can't even say how much this is so me!  I am forever letting other peoples thoughts and opinions affect me in my life.  I have always let these words that spew out of someones mouth dictate how I can going to feel.  I don;t have to like what someone says or even agree with it.  That is there observation.  they are entitled to it just as I am entitled to my own.  When I give meaning to a comment someone says, I am in reality giving them power.  Literally handing them my own power.  I made a promise to myself a long time ago.  I will never let any person have power over me again, ever!  My own lessons learned through having the kind of father I had and living through the childhood I did.  No one was to have that kind of power over me again.  Without even realizing it, I broke my own promise to myself.  Because letting something as insignificant to my own reality as someones opinions get under my skin was just as damaging as letting an over-baring man take away my goodness and innocence.  I have re-made that promise to myself and I am going to do my best to stick to it and not let the words of others bother me again.

This lead to anger and forgiveness.

'Forgiveness is giving up the hope that the past could have been any different.'

I 100% believe that to forgive is for you, not for the person that needs to be forgiven.  Holding on to that anger and hatred for someone or events that took place will never let you move on fully.  To forgive is not saying what happened to you is ok.  To forgive is not giving the person or persons who hurt you off with a slap on the hand.  To be the person who is in a place that you can forgive is saying that you are accepting what happened to you, you know that it can never be changed and you are strong enough to move on and move past it.  It took me awhile to get to a place where I can say I have forgiven.  It doesn't mean that I still don't.  That won;t go away entirely.  But I can say that I have moved on, accepted and don't look back wishing I can change it.
I have forgiven the neighbour who sexually abused me for 3 years.  He took away my innocence, my trust and in place of them gave me many years of self doubt and worthlessness.  By forgiving, I'm not saying it's ok, I'm saying I have moved beyond that point and I'm ok.
I have forgiven my father.  For not being there for me, for turning his back on me when I was at my most vulnerable.  By forgiving him, I'm not saying 'I want you in my life', I'm saying I have moved beyond that point and I don't need that negative influence to succeed in my future.  It still hurts knowing that my own father doesn't love me enough to want me in his life.  That hurts very much.  However, that doesn't define me.  Not anymore.  And I'm ok!

This week, I also learned that you become what you believe.  We need to pay attention to the life that we have right now.  Believe that there is a reason why we are here, now, in this moment. 

'If you can see it or believe it, it is alot easier to achieve it.'

Do you believe that you are worthy of happiness?  I know this can be a tough one for many of us.  Believing that you deserve all of your wildest dreams to come true can seem like wishful thinking, but just knowing that you deserve it is leaps and bounds better then telling yourself it will never happen, not for someone like me.  Because you know what?  I can happen!  To find your true purpose, pay attention to the life that you are leading now.  Know that you are worthy.  You allow  the truth of yourself to express yourself.  If you are a write, whether 15 people or 15 million people read what you wrote, you are a writer. 
'Shadow beliefs are holding you back from the life you deserve.  Escavate and unleash what you really believe.  If its not working for you, change it.' ~ Oprah's Lifeclass
I encourage everyone to tune in to OWN and watch Oprah's Lifeclass.  I promise that there will be at least on episode that you will be able to match to your own life and allow it to have an everlasting impact.  From what I understand, Fridays episodes that they are calling Joy Uprising will be just that.  She will go back and reminisce over previous guests and what moments really and truly were cause for a joy uprising!  For sure a feel good hour, bringing a familiar tear of gladness and joy.  I mean, honestly, just seeing my Lady O back on tv everyday is enough to bring a woot woot of joy and hours upon hours of the happy dance around my apartment.  But even more then that, to again learn from one of my most trusted teachers of life, I am inspired, in awe and in appreciation once again.  Yeah, I'm kind of a fan if you didn't know yet!
Hope you all enjoyed my latest thoughts.  Thanks for tuning in again guys and gals!
Misty
xo
                                                                                                                                      

Sunday, October 9, 2011

Thanksgiving Time!

Thanksgiving is upon us again.  Gathering with loved ones, feasting on a delicious meal and giving thanks for the many wonderful things we have in our lives. 

For the obvious choices, I am thankful for my friends and family who continuously show me love and accept me for me, no matter what I say, do or look like.
I'm thankful for having a plan and working at getting what I want.  I'm thankful for finally knowing I am worth it, that I matter too.  I'm thankful for realizing that a baby is what I ultimately desire and having the gumption to go out there and get it, no matter what.  I'm thankful that my wants will not diminish or waiver even if others may look down upon me for how I plan to go about doing this.  Getting myself healthy and fit to prepare my body for IVF is nothing tom be ashamed of.  Personally, I think its brave for a woman to go out and get what she wants, not letting the fact that she is doing it alone stop her.  Kudos to her, and kudos to me!

On a smaller scale, the little things to be thankful for are just as important.  And because we all have those moments where we complain, we all know that some little things can also be a pain in our asses and something to not be so thankful for.

I'm thankful for rainbows, the smell outside after it rains, Alanna's giggles, the way I feel when I hear, 'I love you Auntie Misty', Mama's cooking, retail therapy, for my mom being the only parent I need, kitty kisses on my nose before I even open my eyes in the morning, Spumante Bambino, my blackberry, chocolate, my blog and the people who read it....and comment on it, OPRAH, reading a great book, being smiled at, sleeping in and having a lazy day, Starbucks Soy Pumpkin Spiced Latte, PETA,  hot bubble baths, flush toilets when camping, people who volunteer, coffee, being surprised at work with a bouquet of flowers,  flip flops, cool autumn breeze, my ipod, music that motivates me.

Okay, now the things that I am not so thankful for that I know I'm not alone in thinking.  I'm not thankful for foods that are bad for me, hangovers, flights costing so much money, having to work 2 jobs, dentist bills,  skinny bitches who act like skinny bitches,  turning on the radio just as my fav song is ending, feeling depressed, swollen ankles, stress, being alone on a holiday, apartment buildings, whole wheat bread, farting when sneezing, clowns (enough said here!), crying over commericals, always having to cook for one, heavy metal music, hairballs.

I wish you all a wonderful long weekend spent with your loved one.  If you are spending this holiday alone like moi, don't frett!  Enjoy it all the same. Make yourself a yummy meal, have a glass or two of wine, sit back and watch a good movie or read a great book.  Know that you aren't truly alone.  You ahve people in your life who love you and would be lost without you.

Take it easy gang!  Until next time...

Misty
xo



Saturday, October 1, 2011

Dear Friend,

How are you?  I hope these last few weeks are finding you in good spirits.  So sorry I have been incommunicado lately.  It feels as though time has been slipping by.  Just by blinking, it is already October.  I'm not sure about you, but I am asking myself where the hell this year has gone. 
How's work going?  Did you get that raise you were hoping for?  If you did, good job!  You deserve it!  If not, don't give up.  Keep fighting the good fight.  You have earned it so don't let a few set backs stop you from reaching your goals. 
As you know, I have set some goals for myself this year.  A few I have reached, some I am still striving towards.  Work is good.  I have 2 new opportunities infront of me.  I am hopeful that one of them will pan out and full time status will be mine!I feel like I have earned it and whatever this new opportunity brings it will be something that I can succeed at and show the powers that be that I am even more valuable to have around then they already think.
I'm still trying to get myself on track with this exercise thing.  I have done great this past week, however,  a combination of doing the treadmill everyday and the damp cold weather has knocked my knee out of commission.  I'm not surprised, but hoping that it gets better in a day or so.  When I get on the treadmill and crank up the tunes, I feel so amazing!! You know how Katy Perry's song Firework is a fav of mine...well.....that seems to be my go to song at the moment.  So much so that I end up replaying it 5 times for my entire workout.  Whatever gets the job done right? Hahahaha  I printed out the lyrics of the song and now have it posted on my vision board.  Did I tell you about that?  You know the vision boards that Oprah was talking about, well I made a big one and put it above my treadmill so as I am huffin and puffin I have something to look at that reminds me why I'm doing all that sweating!  So the words that I am finding most inspirational I have infront of me and proudly sing at the top of my lungs.....funny sight to see I'm aware but it feels awesome!
We can achieve what we set our minds to my friend.  I know obstacles are put in our way but just as easily as they are placed, we can kick them out of the way.  It may be a little more difficult, but the reward and feeling after you do is so worth it!  I'm not gonna say that I enjoy the hardships but I do believe that each and every one of them has made me stronger.  What do you think?  I know this last year hasn't been overly nice to you either.  I pray that you are staying firm in knowing that you are an amazing human being.  You are intelligent and caring and have a beautiful spirit. Just knowing you and having you apart of my life fills my heart with utter happiness!  I'm here for as long as you need me.  Whether to give you some advice, or opinions or just give you that ear to listen and shoulder to cry on.  You make this world a better place to live in. 
I hope in reading this, you know that you are worth it.  And yes before you say it, I know it for myself as well.  We are worth it.  We can achieve it and most importantly we deserve it!

Hope to hear from you soon my wonderful friend.

Yours truly,

Misty
xo

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

34 to Countdown

Today, on my 34th birthday I know how truly blessed I am!  On a day that could have consumed me with what I don't have and who isn't apart of it, I was shown that I am loved and that love fills my heart right now.

With beautiful messages from friends and family left on my Facebook page, the emails I have received and the texts and bbm messages wishing me a happy and wonderful year, I thank each and every one who took the few moments out of their days to let me know that I am loved.  That I am thought about.  In the end, that's all that we really want right?  To know that you matter.  To know that aside from the hectic lives that we all lead, knowing that someone will take even just a few minutes to let you know you are special.  That means the world to me. 
I received a beautiful flower delivery at work today from my mom.  She always knows just what to do!  Just knowing that I have one parent out there in the world who loves me and will always take the time to tell me and show me means more then I can say.  With a biological father who doesn't care enough to even have me in his life, knowing that I have her love and support is all I need.

Today marks the beginning of my countdown.  I am giving myself one year.  One year to lose weight, get healthy and get baby ready.  By this time next year, on my 35th birthday, I want to be walking into a fertility clinic, ready and able to get pregnant.  With the recent medical issues that have arisen this past year, I am determined to reverse what is happening and be physically able to get pregnant and have a beautiful baby of my own.  Since being diagnosed with PCOD, and the specialist I was sent to telling me that I am infertile, it broke my heart.  After finding out that it is reversable, I felt like I was given another chance.  With being on this new journey of living a healthy life, now its time ti kick this into high gear.  One year and then BABY MINE!!
I'm going to start doing some research and hopefully will be able to speak to someone at the fertility clinic here in Toronto in hopes of getting as much information as I can.  In 365 days, I think I can learn alot!

Take it easy everyone!

Misty
xo

Monday, September 5, 2011

Remembering 9/11

We find ourselves on the eve of an incredible tragedy.  In just a few short days we will be on the 10 year anniversary of 9/11.  September 11, 2001 will forever be etched in our minds as a day of terror, loss and the beginning of battle.
This post is going to be a little different from the usual.  I wanted to send out my love and thoughts to any and all who read this, remembering 9/11 along with me.  This is my way to make a tribute, remembering.

This will always be a day in our history that each and every one of us will remember exactly where we were when we heard.  We will remember exactly who we were with, what we were wearing and each step we took that day as we all felt the slow but painful accumulative ache building within us for what was happening to our fellow man.  That powerful tidal wave of emotion rushing over us as we saw it all unfold right before our eyes on the television, through the shaky hands of the persons videotaping the catastrophic nightmare.  The attacks that were brought forth in New York City, to the Twin Towers, the Pentagon in Virgina and the forth plane that crashed in a field in Pennsylvania, that was intended to hit in Washington D.C. were full of hatred and pure evilness. 

I still sit and wonder how on earth this could have happened.  How someone could live with so much hate inside themselves to plan such a horrid attack on another fellow man.  My connection to the attacks on 9/11 and all of the lives lost is the human one.  I did not know personally any of the 2,753 victims who, unbeknownst to them that morning when they went in to work or boarded one of those four planes that they would be sacrificing the ultimate sacrifice in giving their lives for their country, for mankind in the fight for the greater good.  I can feel the lump rising in my throat even now just remembering, going back to that fateful day, and I am not among any of the people who are grieving over a lost loved one.  I can't even imagine what it is to have lost someone by such a senseless act of venomous devastation.

The time for hurting one another has got to come to an end. Each of those precious lives lost must not have been lost in vain.  At the risk of sounding incredibly cheesy here, don't we owe it to them to continue on loving and respecting each other?  Obviously, us as the general public can't make big country wide decisions, deploying out thousands and thousands of men and women to fight for our rights.  But there is something that you can do.  That I can do.  I'm as guilty as the next person when it comes to casting down a judgement against someone. Whether if its what they're wearing or how annoying I think they are.  We all do it.  We all whisper behind each others backs.  We have all walked past, or worse, over someone who may be in need. 

It's terrible that the events of September 11th have come to pass.  What's even more terrible is that it took those events to make us aware that we need to treat each other better.  Love each other better.  Love ourselves better.  Don't walk past that homeless person on the street and then make a comment to your friend about their poor hygiene.  Stop and acknowledge them.  Let them know they are still have that human connection with someone. 

The measure of a man's real character is what he would do if he knew he never would be found out. ~ Thomas Babington Macaulay

Integrity is not a conditional word.  It doesn't blow in the wind or change with the weather.  It is your inner image of yourself, and if you look in there and see a man who won't cheat, then you know he will never will. ~ John D. MacDonald

This year on September 11th, I invite each one of you to join me in a moment of silence for all of the lives lost 10 years ago.  In that moment, I encourage you to reflect back on who we have lost and also what we can gain.  Think about something that you can do for someone, whether it be a loved one or a complete stranger.  A small act of kindness to brighten someones day.  We can do it! We all can make these tiny changes to better someones day.  I'd love to hear about any acts of kindess that you do.

Much love to all.

Misty
xo


Thursday, September 1, 2011

CNE 2011

Yesterday, I had a work team building event at the CNE.  It's a huge fair that comes along this time every year and lasts for a few weeks.  Full of rides, food, games, pavilions of every type, it was a fun and tiring day.  Most definitely will do that again next year! 

However, fun and sun aside, there was one part of the day that caused me to worry. The food.  Not just any food.  I'm not talking about the normal carnival/fair food that you are used to seeing.  The popcorn stands to the cotton candy and candy apple booths.  They are familiar are are all apart of the entire atmosphere.  No, not talking about those at all.  I'm talking about the new stuff.  The food that seems to be getting more popular over the last few years.  It leaves me to wonder if there is a group of people whose job it is to sit in a kitchen and come up with different foods they can dip in batter and deep fry. 

If you wanted to stay away from something that was fried, you can always have the Epic Burger.  A cheese burger with the works, an egg and the clincher?  Instead of regular buns, the burger is between 2 krispy creme donuts.  Seriously?? 

For the deep fried enthusiast there was so many grease dripping options.  Let's see....where to begin?  Deep fried butter, deep fried mars bars, deep fried peanut and jam on a stick, deep fried pop tarts, deep fried brownies, deep fried coke, deep fried cherry aid, deep fried twinkies.  Whew!  I'm sure I'm missing more.  These are just the ones that I saw booths for.

As someone who is trying to eat healthy and eliminate and 'dangerous' food that I always seem pulled towards, it was just unbelievable to me that there was so many killer foods.  Moderation is a key part, I know.  I did have a few bites of the deep fried coke and was able to throw the rest away.  And if I'm being honest, there was a few things that I wanted to partake in, like the deep fried brownie but I resisted. 
I just find it upsetting that there was so much of this, everywhere you looked, there was a deep fried this or a candy coated that.  No wonder there is so many health and weight related illnesses. 

I know I can't control what anyone else eats.  I also know that we all have much much different eating habits.  Some people can walk away from the sugar and the grease and not think twice about it.  While others need to physically remove themselves before being consumed by it all.  It would just be nice to have those temptations disappear.  But I suppose that this all goes back to me.  It's not what is around me but what is within myself.  I have to consciously make the right choices everyday and I have to work at it.  It doesn't come easy to me, and I'm ok with that.  I might complain about it and begrudgingly shuffle my feet away from what I crave but in the end those tough choices are what is going to grant me a healthy and happy life.  After all....Baby Mine!!

Thanks for tuning in guys.

Misty
xo

Saturday, August 20, 2011

My new Mantra

I'm almost at the end of another 7 day detox. It's been a strain at times but looking back over these last 6 days, I feel so good about it! It was all worth it. I'm down 6lbs this week. YAY me!! I did gain a few lbs over the last few weeks but am down those plus a few more. I am now just 4lbs away from hitting the 30lb mark. Feeling awesome about that!

My main thought of focus to give me the extra pushes this week was simple. Two words. A Baby. It's what I want more than anything else in the world. So I have one year. I am giving myself one year to be healthy and fit enough to be in a position to have a child. I'm coming up to my 34th birthday in about 3 weeks. By the time 35 rolls around I want to be ready. I am hopeful that the health issues I have experienced the last few years will have cleared up and will be moving in a positive direction instead of what is happening now. At the moment, I am not able to have children. I am infertile, dealing with what has been diagnosed as PCOD. Polycystic Ovarian Disease. The specialist I have been seeing says that it is completely reversable which gives me great hope that in the end I will be able to have my hearts desire. A child of my own. The first task at hand to get a handle on this is losing weight. Hence my main motivation. If I want a baby, I must must must lose weight. I have to take better care of myself. No way around it.

I'll continue to have my struggles, that's a given. However, struggling to eat properly and fighting with myself to get on my treadmill is nothing to the absolute pain and anguish I feel inside at not having a child. Utter physical pain. I may be ambiguous to most things outside of my own realm of understanding, but if there is one aspect of myself that I know to be truer then anything, truer then the sky is blue, it's that I would be a wonderful mother. I would be present and loving. I would be a teacher and a provider guiding through all of lifes challenges. I want this so bad.

If I am in a relationship with someone and the time came to have a child, I would welcome that with open arms. If I am single, I wouldn't think twice about it, wouldn't skip a beat while on my way to a fertility clinic. If having a child ends up being something that my body won't allow, adoption would be my other alternative. This is going to happen. I believe it. I have to! I have to make this my mantra. To say over and over to myself, something to repeat as much as I need it. Ready for it? My new mantra is Baby Mine.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCgDgJsTR_w&feature=related

A tear jerker I know....I'm boo-hooing here too. But it's a gooder, you can't deny that!!

So my journey continues. Onward and upward. Baby Mine.

Thanks for tuning in!

Misty
xo

Saturday, August 13, 2011

The Power that is a Woman! WHOPIE!!!!

I was recently at a Power Of Women Conference here in Toronto. What an amazing experience. I have been to a few before and this one was yet another opportunity to be in one room with 4000 plus women. At times you could almost feel the pulsating actions of the room. Filled with laughter, tears and ultimately an incredible sense of fulfilment and uplifting motivation. I loved every minute of it!

The speakers were phenomenal!!! The MC of the day was Jessica Holmes who is absolutely filled with such an awesome comedic gift you can't help but laugh! She did impressions of Celine Dion and a Polish singing/rapper woman. She is from the Royal Canadian Air Farce. She is fabulous!!!

The first speaker of the day was Leigh Anne Tuohy. You know who she is. She is the woman Sandra Bullock played in the Blind Side. Her message to us was about giving back, and when you see a child or youth walking down the street, stop and help. He may be another Micheal Orr. Or she may be the person who grows up and finds a cure for cancer. You just never know. Don;t turn a blind eye to someone in need, It only takes a minute to extend out a hand to help them. She told us the Starfish story. About a grandpa walking down the beach with his young grandson. They notice the beach was filled with starfish that washed ashore. They would all surely die. The young boy rushes to them and begins to toss them one by one back into the ocean. The grandfather goes up to the boy and tells him to forget about it. He can't save them all. They have to go. With a starfish in his hand, the little boy looks up at his grandfather, looks at the starfish in his hand and with all his might, throws it as far as he could into the ocean. He said "I saved that one". Leigh Anne said that the power of one is strong. Turn around sometimes because you'd be amazed at the view from behind. What a great lady. My heart felt blessed to have had the chance to hear her speak.

The next speaker was Lorette LeRoche. HILARIOUS!!!!! I have heard her speak before so I already knew what I was in for! She is a stress management pro and speaks of just being happy. Be intent on being happy and when someone bogs you down with their own crap, look them in the eye and tell them to SHUT THE HELL UP!! I learned from her to wake up with gratitude. Loretta says when you wake up in the morning proudly and happily say I'm Back!! Thanks to her, I want to become the fun I am seeking! I felt such a sense of relaxation when she was speaking. I felt myself let go. I felt the tension in my muscles that I had been carrying around for the last few weeks release and I felt wonderful!! To breath in and out and feel refreshed and alive was something that I really and truly needed. I thought to myself, sitting their next to one of my good friends, that this was a place that both her and I needed to be. Talk about right place at the right time!

We also heard from Michelle Dunk and Jill Bolte-Taylor. Both women had jaw dropping stories and proved that they truly did have the Power of a Woman!!

We also heard from Amilya Antonetti. At first I wasn't sure what to think but what I took from her the most was the Power of NO and the fact that I lived my life in 'IF' mode quite often!! I know we have all done it. Said to yourselves If I had a different job I'd be happier. If I made more money I'd be better off. If I lost weight I would feel good about myself. Saying IF to myself all these years had just become second nature. The time for change is now and If just can't be in my vocabulary any longer. I'm sure it'll slip in every now and then but I will focus on being more conscious of what I'm telling myself. IF can't make me happy. Doing and Actions are going to make me happy.

We also were privileged enough to have Suzanne Somers and ELLEN!!! They were both great. Suzanne spoke of aging beautifully and how to get there. She is a gorgeous woman. It was cool to see Crissy from Three's Company!!
Ellen's time on stage was a Q and A. I'm not sure who it was who was asking her the questions but it was awesome to hear her speak about where she came from and her journey on coming out. You can tell that she has an absolute loving and giving heart. She cares so much and it's obvious by anyone who listens to her speak. I was a little disappointed that she didn't dance but that's alright I got over it quickly. Just in case I had the chance to actually meet her, I brought my copy of the O magazine with her on the cover. I so wanted her to sign it for me. Oh well, I'm just happy that I got to be there and be in the same air space as those fabulous females!!

I feel another wave coming over me. A positive reinforcement that I did feel but somehow let it slip through my fingers. I'm about to do another detox. The same one I did a few months ago. I felt so great after that week of doing the cleanse. Both physically and mentally, I could feel all the toxins slough off of me. That is what I am needing now. I want to cleanse myself of all the toxic and negative crap that has built back up inside me over this last little while. I can feel it happening already. It's not about how many times you feel like you have failed at something. More importantly, it's how many time you pick yourself back up and move on. Try it again. Try something different. It's all doable. After all, I don't want easy, I just want possible!

Try to surround yourself with good happy and positive people. It does a mind and body good!!
thanks for tuning in.

Misty
xo

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Times A Changin'

I'm learning. Lately, I feel like I'm learning something new almost every day about myself. Recently, I've learnt that my wants and dreams are changing. Compared to the desires I had as a young adult in my early twenties just about to dip my toes into the real world, now things are completely different.

My outlook on what is right, not right....all changing. Even my own disapproval with myself is changing. Thinking that I wasn't good enough or that I just wasn't deserving of happiness enough. I think the things I am looking for to make me really and truly happy are new to me. Different.
I don't easily get deterred anymore either. If anything I feel more focused and I guess you can say more stubborn.

As a young 20 something, I had envisioned my adult life to be easy to come by. I think I just assumed that because I had some traumatic events happen to me as a child, that automatically put me in a spot where I should just have something good because I paid my dues so to speak. Even though my self esteem was shot, I really think that I expected good for me from others. What a rude awakening. I still believe beyond any measure that I am owed a wonderful and happy life but whats changed is my awareness that I have to work at getting that. Nothing is handed to you, no matter how many painful dues you've had to paid. As a matter of fact, you may have to fight even harder for what you want. And I'm ok with that now. I want to fight. I want to give it all I can and then some because in the end, all the fighting and struggling will make my victories that much sweeter!

The strength that I have within me is something to be admired. I know this. At times I don't allow myself to believe it because I am my own worst enemy, but deep down I know it's there. I can feel it. Even when I try to push it down, keep it out of sight so I don't have to try, it still reaches up and pokes me, letting me feel it's presence.

The course that I find myself on now is one of hurdles, obstacles, surprises around the bend and a sense of acceptance for myself. I can visualize all the goodness that I have within and match it to all of the happiness I know is out there waiting for me.

I'm grasping the concept that I alone make my dreams come true. I chose the paths I take, the direction I follow to get me to that place where I can one day sit back, kick my feet up and smile the smile that says 'I've made it. I'm here and it was all worth it.'

We all want that, don't we?

Keep fighting the good fight my lovelies!

Misty
xo

Monday, July 25, 2011

A Little Sweatin' To A Whole Lotta Support

After more then a week of not working out at all on account of the disgusting heat that Toronto had looming over us, I came home today and decided to make myself do a bit more sweating. I can honestly say I did not enjoy it, not even a little bit, but after I was done I was happy and the sense of fulfilment I felt was awesome!! I'm trying to get back up on this horse and pick up where I left off. I'm gong to do my detox cleanse again. That's what got this whole thing started for me. It gave me the boost I needed.

I have some vaca time time coming up so I'm not going to do the detox just yet. I'm guessing the second week of August I will do it. Looking forward to it actually. Although it was difficult, I really and truly felt some amazing. My insides felt clean and I was noticing how much energy I had.

I think I will tweak it a bit and add some detox smoothies in there but in general still follow the same regime I did before.

A friend I work with is going to do it with me again. Like I always say, it's more fun and makes it easier when you have someone to take the steps with you! It is important to take on your journey yourself. This is, after all, your life, but if you have a friend there along side you as you take the steps to a happier and healthier life, it just makes the journey all the more enjoyable. When days are tough and you feel like you aren't making any progress, to have that added support by your side may be just what you need to pick yourself back up and carry on through.

I have an amazing friend who is my support when it comes to working out. I feel like I am accountable to her when she asks me if I'm going to hop on the beast today. Whether it be the beast, a work out DVD or some other exercises, I really think that having that person, who may be near or far, asking you what you are doing instead of if you are going to do it is awesome! I'm still have that mind set most days where I have the best of intentions but throughout the day I try and talk myself out of working out for whatever stupid reasons pops in this brain of mine. Sometimes the stupid reasons win out, but other times, when I get that text message from her or a message on twitter from my dear friend, pushing me to get my sweat on, that's all it takes. It's all I needed. So thanks my friend, you know who you are! xo

I would gladly be anybody's support should they need that perk up or voice over the phone. It only takes a minute to let someone know you are there for them and you stand by them and support each step they take. It makes all the difference in the world.
If anyone wants this detox or to follow along with me when I do it, you are more then welcome!!

Thanks for tuning in kiddos!
Take it easy!

Misty
xo

Saturday, July 23, 2011

Some little tips for a healthy day

If any of you are like me, I tend to look for any kind of healthy weight loss tips that I could easily implement into my day to day routine. I fine that if I try small things I get way better results! Through some reading I did the other day, I found that many different cultures had various ways of cutting the calories and chopping the pounds. I wanted to share some with you guys. Some I think I will try and put to use myself. This info below I got from the Best Health Magazine, May 2010.

Germany - Eat breakfast. We've all heard it before. Eating breakfast in the morning gives you a great start to the day. It will give you the boost you need and that extra oomph of energy.

India - Do more yoga. Although I am not into yoga it would be something that I can see myself doing once I was at a more comfortableweight. It has been said that people who do yoga on a regular basis have a lower BMI.

Thailand - Eat spicy food. Hot peppers raise your metabolism but also, it's been documented that spicy food makes you eat slower, therefore taking your time with your meal and allowing you to know sooner when you're full. So, make sure you add a few dabs of hot sauce to your meals.....nothing wrong with that!


South Africa - Drink rooibos tea. Drinking this naturally sweet tea instead of your specialty coffee could save you thousands of calories a month.



Mexico - Eat a big lunch. If you try to get in the big meal of your day at lunch and eat a smaller dinner, you'll wake up hungry and therefore eat breakfast and so on and so forth. Having a smaller dinner cuts the calorie intake and you aren't eating alot before bedtime.


Hungary - Eat more pickles. The vinegar in the brin is said to have an affect of lowering your blood pressure, blood sugar levels and fat formation. Although be careful as this food can be high in sodium. I wonder if the deep fried pickles I plan to eat on my vaca next week are included in this? Um, I kinda think not. *sad face*

Poland - Eat at home more often. When you eat out it is so much easier to eat unhealthy. Not being able to see what is going into your meal and how much. Limit your eating out as much as you can. This includes bringing your meals to works. I know it can be hard to always plan enough ahead of time to bring breakfast and lunch to the office, but giving it that extra 10 minutes to prepare will save you a load of money and also a load of empty calories!


Norway - Spend time outdoors. Getting out and walking can do wonders. Planning a routine to get out with yourself or family and friends and go for a good hearty walk will surely do the body good!



Japan - Take a nap. We all have said it on many an occasion. 'I'm going to have a nap when I get home' Most of us never do because once you get home there is always something that takes your attention away. It has been said that sleep deprivation can be tied to weight gain. So when you get home from work, take a little shut eye time for yourself. If anyone asks, just tell them you are trying to lose weight!



Hope these little tidbits helped! Thanks for tuning in again dudes!


Misty

xo

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Happy Happy Joy Joy...NOT

Mad, cranky, pissy, annoyed, angry, frustrated, agitated. These are among the many emotions I felt this morning. Shocker here....I have an anger management problem. At least that's what my therapist says.

Today was a work from home day for me. I woke up feeling good. A little from working at my other job last night, but in general fine.
I opened up my laptop, went to log in to get to work and nothing working. I couldn't get logged in to any of my systems or applications. So frustrating......to top off I knew I had to call our support team for assistance. Two hours later, most issues were fixed but still have 2 that they had to escalate.

I know that whatever happens is completely out of my control. I know that I let things affect me way to easily!! Why is that? I think it has alot to do with feelings of helplessness and the powerful urge I have to be in control. When something doesn't go my way or the way I think it should go, I have a very hard time accepting that. I'm working on it and have made progress but obviously, I still have my moments.
When someone has felt so powerless and when control over their life was never really theirs (or maybe not so much not theirs but more like they didn't fight to keep it, it was just easier to give it away)when this happens and you begin to take back your control, it almost becomes an internal battle to ensure you never lose it again. Without realizing it, it can turn into an obsessive feeling so when the littlest thing occurs that doesn't fit into your plan.....BOOM!

Just breath. Seriously..... As you're breathing in and out slowly, think to yourself what it is exactly that you're upset about. Ask yourself what caused it and then talk yourself off that proverbial ledge. Once you are being rational and thinking clear, the anger goes away. The goal here is to get to a point where the anger doesn't even take over where I need to use and think. To get to a point where I can just let the little mishaps in life just roll off my shoulders and continue on. I will get there!!!

There are so many things to be grateful for. Little things, big things, unimportant things. No matter what they are, I am thankful.

Just yet another step on my journey. Always the adventure. And this is proving to be quite the adventure, filled with unexpected highs and lows. The most rewarding feeling is that I am doing this all on my own. I am not going to depend or expect anyone to do this for me because at the end of the day, although I have people who truly love me, I can really only count on myself to be happy. I feel like this time next year if I stay on course with my journey, big exciting changes could be upon me!!!

Thanks for tuning in kiddies!

Misty
xo

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Damaged Tools

I'm going to change things up a little for this post. Although, I firmly believe that my addiction of food and body image issues stem from what I want to talk about today.

I watched a repeat of Oprah yesterday. It was about twin sisters who were raped repeatedly over a number of years by their two older brothers and their father. It was enough to knock the wind out of you just listening to it. My heart broke for these 19 year old girls who had to endure such devastating treatment by the people in their lives that should have been their to protect them from any harm.

Child abuse takes on so many evil and dark faces it can be hard to recognize at times. It's been documented that a child is sexually abused every 13 seconds. Every 13 seconds!
As the protectors over these little ones, we need to step up and take a stand against this disgusting mistreatment of a child. We all need to open up our eyes and listen. Listen to that whisper because sometimes that's all it will take.
They are out there. And more often the not, these predators are known to their victims. They take the time to groom these children and make them feel safe, building a trusting relationship with. Then when the timing is right, they make their move.

I am a Survivor of childhood sexual abuse at the hands of a neighbour. From the ages of 8 to 11, I was groomed and then abused by a man whom I thought I could trust and who myself and my parents thought I would have been safe with.
Thankfully I have gotten amazing therapy and can understand why I do and how I feel. Being abused really does change the person you might have become. It veers you on a different course. When your innocence is ripped away from you, you have no choice but to go into survival mode. Granted survival mode at that moment isn't best, but you do what you think you have to just to make it through the day.

I have this analogy. When you are born, each and every one of us are given inner 'tools'. These 'tools' are there for us to build a healthy and productive life for ourselves. When a child is abused, whether it is emotionally, physically or sexually, these tools become damaged. Then when it comes time for a child to start building their life, they have no other option but to use these damaged tools. Your entire structure is unstable and it is only a matter of time, without the proper help, that the structure comes crashing down.

"Forgiveness is giving up the hope that the past could have been any different."

I had to forgive. Not for anyone but myself. Carrying around resentment in your heart does you no good whatsoever. Once I was able to accept my truth that there was or is nothing that could or can be done to change what happened to me, it opened up my eyes. And my heart. And so I find myself on this journey. If you have been reading any of my other posts you'll know that I have begun a weight loss journey. But that isn't the only thing I am trying to accomplish here. This is an all over body life style change, both on the outside and the inside.

My only ask to anyone who is reading this and may suspect something is this. Be attentive. Listen to that little tiny nagging feeling you may have about how a child is looking or acting. Be aware. Ask. Put yourself out there and let the child know you can listen to them.

If you yourself are currently suffering or have suffered from any type of abuse, just know that you are absolutely and 100% not alone. There are people who can help. You have endured and you are a Survivor. Welcome.

Misty
xo

Monday, July 11, 2011

Meatless Monday July Edition





Hey Gang!! Another awesomely fabulous meatless Monday recipe for you all to enjoy. this one is sup easy to make. You can either do it on the BBQ which is what we did or inside on a grill like the George Foreman one.

I went down to the Falls to spend Canada Day with my family. One night we did these pizzas on the Q and they were so scrumptious!!!

Here's what you need:

Naan bread - I used whole wheat

Whatever sauce, cheeses and toppings you like.

My mom and I used:

red, yellow and orange peppers diced up into tiny chunks

mushrooms, sliced

hot peppers

pineapples - diced - I'm not a fan however, but if you like, be my guest!

shredded mozza cheese - get the cheese meant for pizzas because when it melts, it gets all stringy and gooey....YUM-O!

Heat up your Q. On the side of the naan bread that you are putting on to the grill, coat lightly with EVOO. Pop it on to warm up up, about 5 minutes or so.

Take it off and load up all of your toppings, then place it back on to the Q and just the heat do its work! It only takes about 5-10 more minutes. Remember, you're not cooking it, just warming it and leaving it on there long enough for your toppings to get hot and your awesome cheesy goodness to melt.





Remove from grill, plate and ENJOY!! See? So simple and yet so incredibly tasty!!



Until next time kids!

Misty





xo

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Mishaps happen....say that 5 times fast

I had to give my head a shake today. I obviously still am faced with quite the difficult road ahead of me and I am still learning as I go. As a matter of fact, I still have a lot to learn when it comes to living this healthy lifestyle that is no longer a desire but an absolute must.

I've struggled this last week and it's scary to know that even though it is so hard and a constant struggle every day to eat the right things and exercise the right amount, that doing the opposite comes so easy and naturally to me. I wish this was not the case but HELUR!!! It is!!!

I wanted to do some baking and bring it in to the office but when I really thought about it, I knew that all of the yumminess I would bake wouldn't make it in there. I wish I could be that person who could bake cookies and only eat one or two. Leaving the rest in a container out of sight out of mind. But instead, that container consumes my thoughts. Although I am learning portion control and I have had moments of clarity with regards to a single serving of ice cream or just a taste of something sinful, I obviously still have a lot to learn here.

But these last few days it was like a snowball effect. First, the long weekend came and I allowed myself not to work out at all. that was the start. Then it was eating something I shouldn't which lead to eating more things I shouldn't which lead to yesterday eating whatever was placed out infront of me.
This week has been filled with the the sadness of a close friend of mine and her family. They have suffered a loss. Yesterday there was a gathering at her house with lots of people and lots of food. And where was I? Standing right by the food of course.
I know that I am still on the brink of my journey but I was, probably naive in hoping that I have learned enough to not put myself into a tight spot where I feel trapped and suffocated by food.

Again, HELUR!!!!! I have an addiction. I know what it's like to feel panic over food. The overwhelming consumption of it all over when will I eat again, what will I eat and how much can I have. These last few days have shown me one thing. That this is going to be an on-going battle that I must face for the rest of my life. The silver lining here is once I can grasp the handle of how to do this and what works best for me, it will be a a little more smooth sailing. Once I am able to reach a healthy course, the maintaining of that healthy course will be something that I can do in a more relaxed state of mind knowing that I have already accomplished the steepest of hurdles. However, food is something that we need to live. We need food to survive. So, sadly for me, the thing that has become such an unhealthy addiction isn't something that I can walk away from and never look at again. I have to learn how to live my life using food as a tool of sustenance instead of using it as my drug of choice looking for that next fix.

After work today, I had to do some grocery shopping. I did well and got plenty of healthy food options, however, I did buy a package of cupcakes, without even realizing, I just picked them up. As I was on my way home, it started to sink in and it occured to me what I did and what the consequences could mean for me. I knew that I needed to snap out of this funk I let myself get into this week and pick up the pace of my journey before it totally gets away from me. So what became of those cupcakes you ask? Well, I will gladly tell you! I came home, put down my bags of groceries, took the cupcakes, walked right back out the door and headed for the back of my apartment building. What's back there? The dumpsters!! And that is where those cupcakes are right now. I then came back into my apartment, put away my groceries and changed into my work out clothes because I knew that I had to get my ass on the beast to sweat out some of the crap I've let myself eat.

So tonight, after working out and eating a light dinner, after having a cool shower, because its hot as hell in my apartment, I find myself in an almost coaching state of mind. I keep telling myself that I can do this. I just need to pick it right back up where I left it off last Thursday and this it totally possible.
The most important thing for me right now is to remain positive and ensure that that infamous demon of self doubt doesn't creep in on me tonight in my sleep. So I had a mishap, we all have. But I am picking right back up and moving forward.

We can do this everyone!! For any out there who are struggling too, please know that you are not alone. this is why I am writing this blog. Because I know I'm not alone. I know that there are so many other people that have the same hurdles as I do. We can do this together!

Misty
xo

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

You win some you lose some

I had big hopes for today. I had a job interview for an Analyst role but it just didn't go so well. This particular role ended up being way to technical and I didn't have any of the qualifications that was required. The hiring manager was great and took some time to give me some pointers and some advice on what types of things I need. There are some courses that I am looking into taking. Although it was a setback I need to stay positive. But I gotta be honest here, I did have a little melt down after the interview. I just got my hopes up.

As most people know about me I am quite emotional. Total emotional girl here! Sometimes the emotions take over before I realize it and the tears start rollin'. I just put so many expectations on myself and when it doesn't happen I feel that old monster of disappointment creep up on me again. It's almost like it's an old bad habit, hard to break free from it. I am in a good place, I feel great and really do have a bright outlook on what is to come. But for a few minutes, good ole disappointment in myself makes an appearance.

Why is that I wonder? Why does it seem to slip in there? Once I realize it's there, I kick it back out, but why or maybe how does it make its way in? My only answer to that is this. As much as living a healthy lifestyle and eating healthy and exercising is important, it's still a struggle. The physical aspect of the journey I am on is like jumping hurdles everyday. Well, the mental and emotional aspect plays a part as well. Just like I'm teaching myself to live that healthy lifestyle physically, emotionally and mentally I have to take care of myself too. It's no secret that I've dealt with some dark demons. Now comes the time where living a positive life is for both my inner and outer self. There may have been a time where I would retreat into the darkness and try to hide there for as long as I could, but that time has passed. I want to live the absolute best life I can. I don't want to hide anymore. I don't want to pretend that life is peachy. I am determined to find that happy life because I know that I truly and absolutely deserve it. I may still come across a few road bumps along the way but you know what? That's okay. I'm allowed to. I'm not following anyones rules here. I am making up my own rules as I go.

So, just because I didn't get this job today......I am choosing to look at it as 'No sweat' I am going to use this as another stepping stone to get me one step closer to where I am supposed to be.

I did use the frustration I felt to my advantage! When I came home from work I popped in one of my Biggest Loser workout DVD's and let it kick my ass. And I actually felt better after. You know, there might something to this exercising thing...LOL! Aside from getting out some tension, working out is letting me start to see changes in my body when it comes to clothes. I still can't see any changes looking into the mirror, but clothes don't lie. Not only was I able to wear a pair of dress pants today that I haven't been able to get over my ass since last year, a few ladies from my office made comments to me that the jeans I was wearing yesterday were too big for me! Really? Hahahaha Yay!!!! They said that the jeans were saggy in the bum. HA! How about that?!

Thanks for tuning in again boys and girls!! Keep smiling and stay on the positive track with me. I promise that it is worth it!! Doesn't it feel great?! Yah, I know!!

Misty
xo

Monday, June 27, 2011

Another Meatless Monday

Today, on the menu is Stuffed Peppers.....I just took them out of the oven and let me tell you...the smell is absolutely divine!
I couldn't find any recipes that appealed to me so I made this one up as I went along.


Misty's Vegetarian Stuffed Peppers


6 lg red peppers - cut in half and seeded
1 pkg Yves Veggie Ground Round
1 cup cooked brown rice
4 tbsp EVOO
1-2 garlic cloves - minced
1 cup red kidney beans - rinsed well
1 cup stewed tomato's
1 jar of your favourite pasta sauce - I used Classico Four Cheese


Heat oven to 400.
In a large pot of boiling water, add the peppers once they have been washed, cut in half and seeded. Boil for about 10-15 minutes.
Cook rice according to directions on box and set aside.
Open up can of kidney beans, empty into a strainer and rinse very well. Also open up tin of stewed tomato's and drain those as well; set aside.
In a large frying pan add the EVOO and garlic. Saute garlic for a few minutes just be sure to watch it so the garlic doesn't burn. Add the Yves 'meat' and cook for 8 minutes. Season to taste. I added salt, pepper and some parsley.
When the peppers have boiled, they should be soft to touch but not falling apart. Add a few spoons of sauce to bottom of baking dish. Assemble peppers in dish. I also added a small spoon of sauce inside peppers. In a large bowl mix together rice, kidney beans, stewed tomato's and 1.5 cups meat mixture. Incorporate everything together really well. Scoop mixture inside peppers. Top with remaining sauce and sprinkle some parm cheese on the top.
Cover with tin foil and bake for 25-30 minutes. Let stand 10 minutes and dig in!!!! ENJOY FRIENDS!!!!!!!











Until next time!
Misty
xo

Saturday, June 25, 2011

Mini Goal Victory!!!

Oh Happy Day!!! I have reached my first mini goal!!! As a mini goal I set out to lose 20lbs and as of this morning I have lost 21lbs. YAY me!!!!
I feel so great and actually proud of myself. I know that I still have alot to learn when it comes to healthy eating and exercising but I am getting there. Learning something new every week, every day....I am a little on the bubbly side right now!!

If I have learned anything over these last few months that has really stuck with me is that you only get what you put in to this. If you are serious about making a change and really want to see the benefits of what you are working towards it really is a full time commitment! It's hard work and if I'm being honest, I need to work harder. So I will, if that's what it takes!

My next mini goal is to hit 50lbs. So 29 more lbs to go. I can do it! And so can any of you out there who are reading this. We have all heard people say, 'If I can do it, so can you'. Sometimes that would really frustrate me. Everyones journey is a struggle in a different way. We all have varying obstacles to overcome and what I find and easy change may not be for you and vice versa.

Short and sweet post today kids. Don't forget to tune in Monday for another Meatless Monday. Until then, take it easy!



Misty xo





"What this power is I cannot say; all I know is that it exists and it
becomes available only when a man is in that state of mind in which he knows
exactly what he wants and is fully determined not to quit until
he finds it." ~Alexander Graham Bell

Monday, June 20, 2011

Meatless Monday

Happy Monday Everyone!
As promised welcome to Meatless Mondays! I made myself a YUM-O California style veggie burger and matched it with a salad.








1/2 avocado, sliced thin
1/2 roasted red pepper
2 tbsp BBQ sauce
1/4 cup shredded cheese
1 veggie burger patty, I use LICKS Nature Burgers....So amazing!
1 thin burger bun
Salad, I used an Iceberg Medley
2 tbsp dressing, I used PC Artichoke and Asia go

Using my George Foreman grill, I coated it with a little EVOO. Once heated up I slide the veggie burger on there. It only takes about 4-5 minutes per side. I like to coat both sides with a little bit of BBQ sauce. Once its flipped over, add your red peppers to the grill. Then slice up your avocado. The other half, make sure to leave to pit in it as this will keep it from turning brown a little longer. Shred up your cheese and then place it on the burger about a minute or so before its done. Once the cheese begins to melt, top it off with the roasted red peppers
Once both sides are cooked up on the burger, place it on top of your bun. Top with the avocado slices and if you like a few lettuce leaves. Cover with other half of your bun. You can toast the bun if you like for a little extra crunch.
In total, the burger with all the fixins as well as the salad with the dressing, 790 calories.

So simple to make but I promise it is so tasty!!!! I find the avocado really makes the entire burger!!

Hope you guys enjoy! I know there are some head strong meat eaters out there but at least give it a try. You may not even be able to notice the difference.

Enjoy and until next time kids!

Misty
xo

Sunday, June 19, 2011

Just another Sunday

Happy Sunday all! Hope everyone is having a great weekend! I wanted to post a quick note here. I have had a rough week. I didn't gain but I didn't lose either. This just tells me that I need to eat better still and also sweat more. I started using one of my Biggest Loser workout DVDs and I think this will be the ticket. Yes walking on the beast is great for me, and I do get the heart rate going and work up a sweat but not enough, obviously. I'm still learning here. I'm still motivated and still know that I can reach my ultimate goals, I just need to re-adjust and re-plan my next moves. I'm down 19lbs in total and that is something to be proud of. I just have to keep up the pace and stay focused and motivated. Baby steps yes, but eventually my baby steps are going to need to turn into big girl steps.
I have been doing quite a bit of research online as well as looking for as many healthful tips as I can. Even though there are oodles of them out there and I of course won't use them all, even if I can obtain a few a week that I implement into my daily routine. thought I would share some of the tips with you.

Healing Hands

I am a crafty person. I find that if I am keeping busy doing a craft like scrap booking, it keeps my hands busy with a non-food activity.

Sweet Treats

Smoothies are my new post-workout reward. I either make a protein smoothie that gives my a yummy chocolate kick or I make a low fat fruit smoothie with lots of fruit and non-fat yogurt.

Gourmet Flavour

Instead of mindlessly eating a candy bar or a heaping bowl of ice cream, it's all about portions. I've figured out that I really don;t need the entire bowl of ice cream. I really only crave the taste so a few bites really do get me through. For Chocolate, I break off one or two pieces of dark chocolate, eating one piece at a time, letting it melt on my tongue. By the time I'm done, my craving has gone away. For ice cream, I just found the best thing at the grocery store.











These little Skinny Cow ice creams are only 150 calories and there were a few different flavours to choose from!! YAY!!!

Well, that's it for today. Tune in tomorrow. I am starting a Meatless Monday post. So if you are into trying a vegetarian lifestyle for the day, I will have some fabulous recipes that anyone can make that are so tasty and animal friendly.

Talk care kiddies,

Misty xo

Monday, June 13, 2011

I'm the $@*!

This morning, while on my way to get a coffee from the Timothy's at my office building, a feeling came over me that was a bit familiar, although it had been so long since I felt it, I wasn't quite sure what it was at first.
I finally realized what it was when a few random people walked past me and I didn't get my normal nervous fear of someone seeing me. Although the feeling only lasted for a brief few minutes, there it was! I was walking with my manager and I said 'You know I feel different today. Not like I have an attitude, but its something else. I feel like.... I'm the shit'.
I was actually walking with some confidence and it felt wonderful! For those few brief moments I felt deserving....and looked good enough to where if I was told a hot brother was checkin' me out I would actually believe it. Over the last few years if I ever heard 'Oh look, he's checkin' you' I would have an extremely difficult time believing that. (Maybe I was even walking with a strut. For those of you who know me personally, you know that I absolutely do not have a strut. I fear that I come across as looking as though I'm constipated. Fingers crossed the hot strut comes soon! LOL)
Like I said, it only lasted a few minutes but it put me in such a great mood today!
I know that I am doing something right. I know that my mind is changing, my way of thinking is changing. I think that is such a huge part of the battle right there. When you can alter your thinking and accept that nothing is just straight black and white, you are doing great! You are going in the right direction!
Black and white thinking is very hard for me to let go of. It's just the way my brain automatically is geared towards. I am feeling very optimistic that I am still on the right track and my journey to my new life has fully commenced!
So...YAY ME!!

I wanted to give you guys a few healthy tips that I find helpful. Remember, I am doing this in baby steps for the time being. Once I learn more and am more mobile, I plan on kicking this into high gear! After all, I have a 5k run to train for.

*Track what you eat. Everything. Breakfast, lunch, dinner, snacks....Everything. There are so many apps for your cell phones that you can download for free that provide you food trackers. I use Spark People because they have an app for BlackBerry users. I know a lot of people who have iPhone's use Lost It! I was tracking for a few weeks straight and was doing so well, but began to get lazy with it. I started it back up today and writing down everything I put into my mouth!!

*Don't eat after 7pm. For me, since I try to be in bed between before 11pm I do my best to make sure I don't eat anything after 7 o'clock. If I am starving then I will limit myself to a piece of fruit.

*Fill your fridge with fresh fruits and vegetables. This is something that I still struggle with but when I am able to do it, it does wonders for the entire week of eating. On the Sunday before the work week begins, cut up all your fresh fruits and veggies and pop them in the fridge. Make individual baggies of them so you can just grab and go. The more easy you can make eating healthy the better. How many times have we all said, I just don;t have time to eat a healthy meal or have time to cut up snacks for work in the morning. If you can set aside 30 minutes on a Sunday, you can eliminate all of the excuses for the rest of the week.

*Freeze some grapes. Sweets are a major downfall for me. I have found an awesome snack that gives me my sweet fix. It's as simple and washing a handful of grapes, putting them in a baggie and popping them in the freezer. Once they are frozen, they are the best yummy snack. Love them!!

*Make changes gradually. Set small achievable goals. We all want huge results fast. But that just doesn't happen for most people. If you are like me, setting small goals that are in reach you will get better results. I have gone gung ho and many things, and after a week or two it fizzles out. I would much rather take my time and see continuous results. It is so much more rewarding!!

I hope you find these helpful and useful and by all means, if you have any tips that you would like to share, please please do!!

I have asked a friend of mine who does quite a bit of healthy vegan cooking to give me some of her recipes. I will share those when I can.

Thanks for tuning in lovelies!! Until next time...

Misty
xo

Thursday, June 9, 2011

1 donut, 2 donut, 3 donut...NONE!

Cough cough sniffle sniffle. I am still under the weather however feeling better today then yesterday. I came down with a nasty cold and cough a few days ago. My mom was here visiting me for a few days over the weekend and go figure, the day she leaves I get sick. And I'm not ashamed to admit, I asked her to come back and take care of me! You guys know what I'm talkin about. Moms just know how take make the sniffles better. She didn't come back mind you....no really I'm fine, the tears dried up last night.
With having this cold I haven't had much of an appetite which could be a good thing but at the same time I know I'm not getting enough nourishment. I was a little hungry today so I did alright with eating proper meals.

Now here comes the dilemma. Since feeling a bit better today, I thought about walking up to the Tim Hortons to grab a coffee, and no sooner did that thought come into my mind, so did the thought of getting a few donuts too. Before I go any further, let me just say that I didn't. Here is where the difficulty of being a food addict comes into play. When my mind gets wrapped around something like food there are times where it is hard to let it go. I have used food as my drug of choice for many years and its not something that I can easily get past. Its going to be hard, there will always be hurdles infront of me. instead of going to booze or drugs, I just always turned to food. I actually just read an article not too long ago that said there was a study being conducted which stated that foods high in fats, sugars and carbs can potentially give you the same response in the brain that we see from drugs like cocaine. This makes total sense to me because I can see how this can lead its way into compulsive over-eating. You need to keep eating to try to reach that ultimate 'high' again. Scary I know and some of you may totally disagree with this. That's fine, I just ask that you keep an open mind. The way many of us deal with stresses are different, much like the way we each deal with addictions are different.

In normal circumstances, getting a coffee and a donut are not a bad thing. I'm not about to deprive myself completely of the things I want, but ensuring that I can maintain control is also important. As I sat on the bed, contemplating, I told myself to be real. Could I really only get one donut? Would I be satisfied with just one? And sadly, I knew the answer. I knew that I couldn't buy just one so the best thing for me to do was not go at all. If I went in there with a different mind set, then I would have been ok. But on this particular morning it wasn't an option for me.

I wonder, is this going to be something that I have to deal with for the rest of my life? I think so. I think that I will learn as I go and my choices will become easier as I go along, however, like an addict, I will always have temptations and my job is to fight them and learn that I can overcome them.
I know that I am by no means alone in this battle. There are so many who struggle the same struggles when it comes to food. We all just have to learn what we can do to jump over the food hurdle. I just wish that it wasn't a cupcake looking back at me when I jump over it!

Because I scared myself a little this morning, I though I had better get my ass on the treadmill. I haven't been on all week on account of being sick. I stepped on today but couldn't last even a minute on account of coughing and hacking. I do feel on the rotten side that I haven't worked out all week but I know that I have a valid reason. This just makes me look forward to when I can again.....WHOA...did I just say that? I think I did. I think I am excited to climb back on the beast and give him a what for! Fingers crossed I can get back to my routine in a few days.

I'm just 1.5 lbs away from hitting my 20 pound weight loss mark. Hopefully will hit that soon and I will be sure to let everyone know!! I'm always looking for tips and healthy snack options. If any of you know of any and would like to share, please do so. I will share some of mine next time too!

Thanks guys for tuning in!

Misty
xo

Sunday, June 5, 2011

Eating vegetarian can be so YUM-O!!!

Coming off of a great weekend with my mom, I thought I would take a few minutes and post a few YUM-O recipes that we had. My mom is a pescatarian like me but for different reasons. I was strictly vegetarian for over a year but have recently become pescatarian when I did that detox cleanse last month. My last doctors visit, she instructed me that I had no choice but to start eating meat again. I told her that I couldn't do that so she said that I had to at least start eating fish again. I wasn't getting no where near enough protein and I had to make revisions in my diet to compensate that. I read a book called Eating Animals by Jonathan Safran Foer. It left such an impression on me that I gave up meat at that moment. As much as I hate the fact that I am eating fish again, at this point there isn't much I can do. But I am going to attempt the true vegetarian lifestyle again in the future. At the end of the day my health has to be more important.
For those who are either already vegetarian, on the verge of making the transition to it or are curious and might be swayed, I strongly recommend reading Eating Animals.

www.eatinganimals.com
Ok, a plug for vegetarians...check! YAY Vegetarians!!

Now on to a couple delish recipes!! Even if you are meat eaters you will love these!! I promise!!

Roasted Portebello Stacks - 2 servings
4 portobello mushrooms
1 roasted red pepper, sliced in strips
1 mini eggplant
1 small onion, sliced, you only need 1 slice for each mushroom
goat cheese
olive oil
thyme
salt and pepper, to taste
Clean and de-gill mushrooms. Cut out stem. Slice veggies. I like mine really thin but its up to you. Toss oil and thyme with veggies. Line on parchment paper. Roast 30 minutes, turning half way thru. Once roasted to your liking began stacking. First place a portobello on plate, then eggplant, onion, goat cheese and red peppers. Season with salt and pepper of you like.
Trust me, so yummy! My mouth is watering right now!

Spinach & Pea Salad
Lg container of baby spinach
1 pkg sugar snap peas
1 pkg frozen peas, cooked and cooled, about 1 cup, but more if you like
light ricotta cheese
mint, chopped, a few sprigs
1/2 c olive oil
1/4 c lemon juice
1 tbsp honey
1/2 tsp salt
Mix oil, lemon juice honey and salt together. Assemble rest of salad and pour dressing over top. Add a few dollops of ricotta cheese on top and serve.
Again, so tasty! Yup...mouth watering again!

Aside from my own personal beliefs about eating meat verses not, ensuring that you add as many veggies to your diet is so crucial to a healthy lifestyle.

I tip my hat to the chef. I know these recipes are pretty simple and straight forward but there is something about moms and when they cook it always tastes better. My mom is so great with finding new and mouthwatering recipes to try out.
She takes such good care of me! I'm lucky to have her support. We actually had a bonding moment a few weeks ago when I went down to the Falls to visit her for a mother daughter weekend. I have always prided myself on how open our relationship is but there were things that I was uncomfortable to tell her. My weight was the main one. Because of my utter shame in it, I didn't think that I could tell anyone. But after the last month or so and losing **17 lbs** now ( gained a few lbs back after the detox but lost those plus another one) I was feeling even more optimistic and a little more positive so we were chatting and I tearfully opened up and told her what my highest weight was. I of course broke down in tears and could feel a lump in my throat, and without skipping a beat she came over and took my hands and I told her. Baby steps. Telling someone how much you weight may not be a big deal for some people, but for others whose weight has controlled their lives for so many years it can be one of the hardest things to utter from your mouth. I am so thankful to have the love and support from her who gives me inspiration, unconditional love and never ending motivation along this my new journey. Love you lots Mama Bear!!

So, great food plus an awesome weekend equals a tired girl on a Sunday night!

Thanks for tuning in guys. Have a great rest of the weekend.

Misty
xo

Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Frustrations

'The greatest oak was once a little nut who held its ground.'
Author unknown

It's been an off day today. Work was a tad on the frustrating side with feeling like I have to fight for what I know I deserve. While in the midst of that, some pictures of myself doing some volunteer work showed up on Facebook and while the volunteering day was amazing and the group of girls I was doing it with were awesome, seeing pictures of me painting walls, bending over and looking generally terrible was not something that I wanted to see today.
I am doing my best at trying to remain positive, seeing the lighter side of things and focusing my angers or frustrations towards getting me where I want to be.
I am feeling a bit better now since being home and forcing my ass to get on the treadmill, however, I'm not gonna lie here. It was a little setback seeing those photos. I know I'm over-weight, I know I am no where near looking the way I want, so seeing that right in front of me was not a good time! Sometimes I can really disgust myself with the sight of what I have let go for so many years. And other times, it gives me the push to keep fighting in the right direction.
I do feel confident in the fact that I did come home and hoped right on The Beast (name for my treadmill). In the past, I would have come home, been grumpy and bitter and probably have stopped off at the store before coming home to get ice cream or something. The thought did cross my mind today but I didn't. I would like to think of that as a tiny victory.

I have started a workout schedule for myself. Instead of the obvious phrase, 'Go hard or go home', I am taking it easy. I need to start slow and work my way up. My goal this week is to get on The Beast 5 days straight. So, in doing this, I am going to start at minimum time and just above normal pace and work my way up. this week I am going to do 10-15 minutes on there and 5-10 jumping jacks. Next week I will increase and the week after increase again and so on and so on. I have a few Biggest Loser Work Out DVDs that I would like to try and incorporate as well.
The important thing to remember here is that there will be obvious setbacks, let downs and truck loads of frustrations to work through. The key is to not let that take me down anymore pegs. I have let that happen too much and for too long. Strength comes from within and if I have learned anything over the past few years, I have more strength inside then I ever give myself credit for.

'I don't need easy, I just need possible'
Soul Surfer

Ok friends, that's it for today. Thanks for tuning in. Know that all things are possible. I'm not the only one that can overcome adversity, so can you! Lets do it together!

Misty
xo

Thursday, May 26, 2011

Live from the heart of yourself

As I'm sure most of you are aware, yesterday was Oprah's finale curtain call. I thought is was done beautifully. Just her and her audience, both in studio and beyond the camera. The show was chock full of life lessons that both she has learned along the way and she has tried to teach us.

'Don't wait for someone else to complete you, Jerry Maguire was just a movie.' How great is that? And how true? How many of us who are single say aloud on numerous occasions that when I meet the right person everything will fall into place. When I meet Mr. Right then my life will be full and make sense. When the perfect woman comes along then I will settle down. How many times can we say the same thing? I'm just as guilty of it as some of you. I always tell myself that if only I had someone in my life I would be happy. Naturally we get lonely and would love to have that other person there beside us to share our lives with but the common misconception that many of us have is that that is the only way we can ever truly be happy and feel the kind of fulfilled life that we all desire. As much as I would love to share my life with someone, to have meaningful conversations with someone and to feel truly blesses and loved from that person, if I never find that, to quote Diana Ross, I will survive. I have to be enough. I am on this new journey by myself. I am taking steps to change my life for the better by myself. And I am going to succeed and overcome any obstacles in my way by myself, on my very own.

'Nobody but you is responsible for your life. You are responsible for your life. What is your life? What is all life? What is every flower, every rock, every tree? Energy. And you're responsible for the energy you create for yourself, and you're responsible for the energy you bring to others.'
I'm still learning this lesson. I think it may be one of the hardest and yet once you get it. Once you really truly get it, it could be the easiest lesson to live. Being honest here, I have shamefully put my happiness in others hands. I have based major life choices on making other people happy. And I have also brought negative energy into my life and the lives of others no doubt. I think this blog is an attempt at bringing some good energy to those who I am privileged enough have read this. I want to reach out and inspire, motivate and uplift whomever I can as I am doing to same to myself. When I motivate myself, I want to in turn do that for you. When I reach a goal, I would love to inspire someone to reach one of their goals. We can all do this. We have the power to achieve our ultimate desires. So if remaining positive, bringing positive energy around me and others gets me to my dreams, that sign me up!

'I've talked to nearly 30,000 people on this show, and all 30,000 had one thing in common - they all wanted validation...They want to know, do you hear me? Do you see me? Does what I say mean anything to you?'
When she uttered these words I can say for sure that the water works really began. She has said it before and I'm sure that the emotions running through me because of the day already but it really struck a nerve with me. We all want to be heard. We all want to know that what we are doing and saying is being taken in by someone else. Speaking as a Survivor who endured some painful childhood events, I grew up never feeling understood. Although I managed to keep my secrets from my family for years, I still felt as though I was being disregarded by them. No matter what I said or did, no one who hear me and maybe no one cared. So I grew up thinking just that. Thinking that no one really sees me so it doesn't matter how big I got, how much I ate. That I was useless and whatever the situation was, it was always my fault. Obviously I was mistaken. I do matter. I am heard. And it was not my fault. I am seen, whether I like it or not. Now I am dealing with being seen when I don't want to be seen because I am so unhappy with how I look. I yearned to be seen as a child so eating was my attempt at that. Now look where that has gotten me. that tells me that when someone is that desperate to be heard, to be seen, they would do anything.

I can't explain this new burning sensation that I feel deep down inside my soul. Yes, it's difficult to get my butt on the treadmill, to not make excuses like 'I'll just do it tomorrow.' But, I'm actually doing it. I know I should be getting on the beast (this is what I have named my treadmill) alot more and I am going to work on this. I am going to set a small goal for the next week. I would like to do the treadmill everyday. No reason why I can't, even if it's for 30 minutes. Any suggestions on other small goals to set? I am always up for comments or ideas on this. I'm learning as I go as any help would be awesome! It'd be great if we can help each other. Come on, take my hand.....

'I won't say goodbye. I'll just say, until we meet again.'

Have a good one guys and gals!

Misty
xo

Thursday, May 19, 2011

My Bucket List

I know alot of you out there have your own bucket list but I thought I'd share mine.......cause, well...it's my blog. hahaha




This is the bucket list today. I like to think of it as an open ended bucket list because all of these items on here are my dreams. Of things I want to accomplish, of people I'd love to meet, of things I want. So having an open ended list only makes sense because I won't stop dreaming, I won't stop wanting. My bucket list is free to grow and grow. The more I am able to cross off, the more I want to add. If any of you don't have a bucket list, I would encourage you to make one. To see your hopes and dreams right there down on paper is exciting. To be able to cross something off is fulfilling.

All of these are in random order...except for the first one. For those of you who know me know that I absolutely 100% adore this person and would feel in complete awe in her presence.






*Meet Oprah and have a heart to heart with her. I have grown up watching The Oprah Show. She has been apart of my Monday to Friday afternoon for so long now I honestly can't remember when she wasn't there. Her wisdom, infinite giving heart and inspiration has resonated with me and made such deep and meaningful impacts I will cherish them and hold them close to my heart forever and always.



*See a Broadway show in NYC

*Surf in Hawaii

*Build a Habitat for Humanity home

*Learn how to knit/crochet - Completed January 2010 - Crocheted a baby blanket for my best friends little girl.

*Find a four leaf clover

*Be part of a flash mob

*Run in a marathon

*Learn to play the guitar

*Open Animal Rescue house out in the country. Ever since I was a little girl watching those Humane Society shows on TV, I have had this deep desire to provide a safe and loving home for animals that have been abandoned or mistreated. A home with a full staff of professionals taking care of these animals in need. giving them food, a warm place to sleep and most of all love.




*Learn to drive - get my license

*Have a baby

*Go to Paris - visit the Louvre and the Mona Lisa, enjoy a french baguette sitting under the Eiffel Tower

*Swim with dolphins

*Write a book

*Watch a space shuttle launch live and in person

*Take a self defense class - Completed August 2008

*See the Great Wall of China








*Learn to speak Italian and travel to Italy. It's Italy, enough said!








*Get hair braided on the beaches of the DR

*Own my own scrap booking/crafty gifts business

*Go bungee jumping

*Go Sky diving

*Get a college degree

*Travel to a 3rd world country and help build a school

*Meet my grandchildren

*Attend the Olympics

*Volunteer in a soup kitchen - Completed September 2008 and many times since.

*Participate in a protest

*Learn how to Rollerblade

*Go on a whale watching adventure with mom






*Send a message in a bottle. How great would it be to send a piece of wisdom or inspiration to an unknown someone. A piece of myself, a memory of myself.





*Spend a New Year's at Times Square

*Be on a reality TV show

*Have a library named after me

* Plant a tree with my niece - so she may learn the beauty, life and energy a tree gives.

*Do the CN Tower Stair Climb

*Teach English in a foreign country

*Teach someone illiterate how to read

*Go to Africa on an animal safari and see giraffe's in their natural habitat

*Own a ridiculously expensive but absolutely fabulous pair of Jimmy Choo's, Manolo Blanhniks or Christian Louboutins.

*Go up in a hot air balloon

*Meet Maya Angelou

*Reach my weight loss goal











*Jump off Sky Tower in Ackland New Zealand. Saw this on the Biggest Loser and immediately knew that I had to do this!



*Walk the outside of the CN Tower




I hope I have started you guys in thinking about the things that you want. Like I said, you can always add to your Bucket List. It is ever growing, ever evolving. Remember, when you dream, dream big!



Have a great night folks!

Misty

xo